Two guys with tans schlepped out of a canoe and into the Under-The-Hill Saloon yesterday afternoon, on their way from Galena, Illinois. They’re with the LMRK (Lower Mississippi River Keepers) and they are trying to raise funds for victims of the Gulf Oil Spill.  Their names are Matt and Justin Michael Dvorak. Matt has a last name but is guarding it as of this moment because he will be on his way to California to work on a government funded medical marijuana trimming project in October, if he isn’t at the Phatwater.  I’m not sure trimming marijuana computes with me, since I was of the opinion that marijuana, once ingested, had a tendency to bring on ravenous appetites, but I’ve never been a user and don’t expect I will be at any time in the future, so if marijuana can be thought of as something about which, in the same sentence, the verb “trimming” is to be used, this just shows how much more I don’t know or care to learn, given that the translation of Hieroglyphics, backwards through a mirror and in living color, holds a far greater fascination for me on my stairway to self-actualization.

You can view Matt and Justin’s exploits here:

http://www.lmrk.org/issues/mighty-missislick-expedition/mighty-missislick-expedition.html

You can also get one of these cool stickers of theirs at this years Phatwater, WHILE THEY LAST.

They began their journey 37 days ago with a third partner; someone named Dave, but Dave, apparently, is no longer with them.  Or, as two marijuana representatives of past fame were once fond of saying, long before Up In Smoke, “Dave’s not here. . .”

PHATWATER REGISTRATION IS NOW OPEN

If you plan to paddle the Phatwater this year, please go to the site, now, and register online.  We ask that you not wait until the day before to register, but that you do so online, now.  It will make everything easier, on everyone.  You will still sign your waiver and pick up your packet on Friday the 8th, at the Under-The-Hill Saloon, but we need your registration and payment (Google Checkout) before this time.  Be sure to have your ACA membership # with you when you go online, www.kayakamississippi.com , to register.  If you are an ACA member and do not supply your ACA #, you will have to pay the additional fee of $5 for non-ACA insurance.

If you absolutely cannot (can’t imagine why?) or will not (can’t imagine what your problem is?) register until Saturday morning, it’s going to cost you double.  Why? Because allowing you to register the morning of the race is a huge PAIN IN THE ASS.

If you still demand to register on Saturday morning, you’ll meet some of our demands as well.  You will be issued a special, blaze orange PFD  (Phatwater Freestyle Diaper), made entirely from a recycled oil containment boom, which you will be required to wear, in addition to your own PFD, for the duration of the race and the party to follow.  This will allow everyone else who plays by the rules to identify those of you who think you’re so damn special.

If you can’t show up until the morning of the race, we understand, and this is fine.  You can sign your waiver at the put-in, and get your boat # at this time, but there’s no reason you can’t register online, in advance, and we expect you to do so if you don’t wish to be penalized and diapered.

And just remember this, we’re here to have a good time.  So, have it MY way!

Time to, Put on my sailing shoes,

All For Now-KB