Phatwater on the Natchez Gauge today is 45.42′ and still rising.  The forecast for Friday is 18Ëš F, so it looks like we’ll be swinging an axe and not a paddle this Saturday.

Heard a report today about how American women returning from holiday in Dubai were having to surrender their dignity, as well as their makeup, to full body scans and pat downs and cosmetics confiscations from complete strangers, due to the latest mutant to board a mideast flight bound for the U.S. who tried to fry it, and all on board, while on the Detroit approach.  Well, enough is enough.  Say what you want, but American women should be inviolate when traveling, and their cosmetics should be held sacred. The time has come to take up arms in defense of our nation.  For, ours is one of ideals which cannot survive if rouge becomes the renegade and mascara is mistaken for munitions. We cannot have our women going about unadorned and unprotected, plagued by the pandemonium of PABA paranoia.  Such a blow to our freedom cannot be tolerated.

But how, you may ask, is it possible to guard against the radicals of Islam, the extremists, bent on our annihilation?  How, in a country such as ours, and of a government dedicated to the freedoms we hold so dear, can we withstand the onslaught of their jingoistic jihad?  Well, I feel I have a solution.

It is common knowledge that muslim extremists cannot gain the kingdom of martyrdom should at any point they be defiled by coming into contact with pork. Enter the Swine Flew Program.  This should nip it in the bud, once and for all.  Join me, all who pray for peace, in supporting this latest DOD program.

All for now-KB