Attempts by Minnesotans to flood New Orleans this past week, in hopes of a change of venue for the NFC Championship Game, were thwarted, thanks to Colonel Culpepper Romaine, of the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers, whose responsibility to adjust flows through the Old River Control Structure at the Morganza Spillway, some 60 river miles below Natchez, resulted in a taming of the Screw.  Screw, in this case, being a reference to the large propellers aft of the giant push boats and their 75,000 horsepower diesels which bring much excitement to the Phatwater, though which, for the past three years, have been rendered impotent, come race day.  Applause, applause.

The Phatwater on the Natchez Gauge, today, is at 32.83′, although, as I said earlier, there is a 10+’ rise on the way which the bohunks and barnburners from Minneapolis tried, though failed, to foist upon us in time for the kickoff.

The game begins in about 4 hours.  Fearful of another slapdash performance, Brett Favre, who as you all must know is a Mississippi Greeting in and of himself, has announced he will be joining the New Orleans Saints, next year, as understudy to Mr. Brees.  We’re told he will be allowed a position as an extra-point holder, though the NFL Players’ Association has filed an injunction on behalf of  Ella Wallagong, of Christchurch, New Zealand,  the only Double Wattled Cassowary to be signed by the NFL to date, and certainly the first two-toed Avian place kicker to pull on a jockstrap.  It is rumored the Geico ‘Cave Men’, who actually live in a Miami Condo, have filed a class action suit in their own right, claiming they’ve been unfairly overlooked by a steroid-sensitive sports media.  Time will tell.

All for now-KB